14-08-2003 22:13 #

Ape-ocalypse Now, Gibbons of Mass Destruction, etc. etc.Destroy Ape Technology

'Blessed Quietness' from Balaam's Ass... until the MIDI kicks in

Secret Chimp

A carefully contrived clutter of images and sound, or simply the natural by-product of a warped mind?

28-07-2003 22:19 #

Programming Language Inventor or Serial Killer?

13-07-2003 16:03 #

Requests for link exchanges are tacky (link to good stuff; be cool and don't expect a link in return), but what could I do when Spelling Mistakes Cost Lives got in touch? There's a legless horse, a crap TV presenter shagging on September 11th, and twisted drawings of Fred West and Lisa Riley.
It's a fucking malevole link magnet, dammit.

09-07-2003 20:36 #

Sky News screenshot
I was impressed by Sky
and Dell's cleverly targeted
'Pick up where you broke
off' and 'Double your
memory' adverts to
accompany this story.

Giving 'control freak' a whole new meaning

Playground Law is full of wonderfully bizarre and politically-incorrect childhood memories.

25-06-2003 22:27 #

A schoolfriend always had dozens of boxes of this evil product in their bathroom. The poor kid was probably mentally (and quite possibly physically) scarred for life.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

MSN screenshot
I'm concerned about their ranking algorithms, but the page title's great.

02-06-2003 21:47 #

Tired of taking crap wide-angle pictures with your camera phone? Hold it up against one side of a pair of binoculars and, hey presto, you've got a zoom lens ideal for taking crap long-distance snaps of kites and sheep.

 Kite. Sheep.

10-05-2003 14:08 #

That daft little animation seems to have gone down pretty well over the past 8 months, with half a million visitors, loads of links, and numerous mentions in print and on TV around the world. But all that was topped by this email:
- - -
From: [name withheld]
I would love to use your Tribute to Ray Harryhausen in a power point presentation. I do leadership development training for the YMCA and think this would be a lot of fun to include.
- - -
(Apparently they loved it, but I'm now somewhat concerned about the future of their organisation; Skeletor's hardly a great leadership role model. Although, to be fair, any manager would find bungling employee Beast Man frustrating to deal with)

06-05-2003 21:21 #

Having spent a weekend scraping, filling, sanding and painting walls I can confirm that The Karate Kid misled us all; performing repetitive property maintenance tasks does not result in arse-kicking martial arts abilities.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

They should just rig up a free barbecue
If you're a smoker going for a walk through the lovely Ryton Wood, it might be a good idea to avoid lighting up until you're well away from ex-landfill Ryton Pools...

25-04-2003 19:35 #

Morcs decided not to eat this, but surely a bit of mottled green fried egg wouldn't have done him any harm?
Can't decide which it reminds me of more: a scene from Alien or that oft-emailed photo of the weightlifter with the prolapse

22-04-2003 21:50 #

From: chobb
Date: 21 April 2003 22:05

Just when I think our site's good I go and see yours. Godammit it you're too talented by half and them some more.
I've sent my Mechanical Barrymore after you and I've set him to 'auto-bum'.
(Don't drop your wallet)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fucking hell, I don't know about wallets but I'm staying well away from swimming pools for a while.

older notes...